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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:08:50 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:08:50 GMT -5
FAIL
OKay, so I'm new at the whole 'blog' thing, so I'll start with a story to let you know a little about me. First, let me give you some background: I'm from Mountainburg, Arkansas, population 686, but is rather close to Fort Smith and Fayetteville (pretty much halfway between). I have been with my fiancee Christine for three year (pretty mush all of high school) and am currently in college. Ok, so now the story.
We'll start where any good story should start - not that this is a good story or anything, I just thought I would try to be clever and start with a cliche, just to piss my writing teacher off, but I digress - oh, dangit what was I saying? Jeez... Anyways, it was a droll Tuesday, until the sudden race to Crawford County Regional to see my uncle's dysfunctional pace maker being all functional and laughing in our faces (at least I assume it was, as a ten year old boy laughs after tying his sister's hair to the bedpost). And so, I went on to my way to my planned activities for the day. Surely all the last minute calling and spur of the moment planning would go off without a hitch. But I'm not Shirley. I remember on my way to my first stop - to pick up my cousin - that I still had no idea whee I was supposed to meet Christine. Okay, I knew somewhere in Alma, but that didn't help much. So I call her home phone, hoping her mom would provide some clarification. One ring. Okay, let her get to the phone... Two rings. Still okay... Three rings. Maybe she's in the back room? Four rings. Or taking a dump? Five rings. C'mon, pick up! Six rings. Just a little longer... Seven r- Forget it. CLICK At this point, I am mildly inconvenienced. No big deal, I just decided to hit up her cell. One ring. I have less patience now. Two rings. I swear I'll hang up after three.. Three r-"Hello?" Thank God. I ask if she knows where I'm supposed to meet Christine, but she is as in the dark as I am. Great. I had all these plans, but one key person is missing. What now? And then, an epiphany! It was still early enough to catch her at school. Sweet. To make a long story short (fail) I picked her up and headed back to my cousin's. Crisis one averted. After I picked up my cousin we headed on our way to Fort Smith, to meet the last person in our jolly group, though I'm not sure 'jolly' is the right word for it. We were great, jut breezing down the road, talking, laughing, it was GREAT. Well, it was just okay, but nonetheless... So, we're doing 'okay' going through Mountainburg. You must realize that since I got my first ticket, I have become a much safer driver, no longer going 75 in a 55 and really doing my best not to speed at all. So I thought I was doing fine when I saw 'ol Barry in his copmobile heading our direction. Until I looked down at my speedometer - 45. Wait, isn't this a 35 zone? Uh oh. I let off the gas and slowly cruised down to 35. Barry starts to turn around at Elm Street. Crap. Lights come on. CRAP. I pull over, and he pulls in behind me. YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING! His radar had got me when I was at 45, so I just politely nodded, said my 'yessirs' and awaited my consequence. And that is how I became the only person to FAIL hard enough to get a ticket in Mountainburg.
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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:09:43 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:09:43 GMT -5
Marvel/DC On my usual trek through the bowels of YouTube, I stumbled across one of the most original and well-made series of videos on the Internet. From the genius that is ItsJustSomeRandomGuy comes a whole line of parody clips of the combined Marvel and DC universes, using action figures as the stars. What starts out innocently enough, some parodies of the Mac v PC commercials, turns into a brilliantly written, action-packed and hilarious adventure that combines the best of the Superhero giants. www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuSI9akJ9_s&feature=channel_page Just go to their channel from there and watch the dozens of amazing videos. You will love it, I know. There are a lot of fakes out there, that attempt to reach the epicness of this series....They all fail. Make sure that while viewing it is by ItsJustSomeRandomGuy. That's how you know it will be high-quality. If you have a YouTube account, SUBSCRIBE! It is as amazing as it sounds, even better maybe. Anyway, I found this really cool and want everyone else to know about it as well. Christine thinks I'm an even bigger nerd and weirdo for this post, and in all honesty, your girlfriend will probably think the same about you if you watch these. But believe me, it's worth it. They just don't understand.
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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:11:17 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:11:17 GMT -5
My Poetry Woes
I've been trying to focus more on my poetry, trying to get more opinions about it and more reviews to see if I'm any good. Christine thinks my poems are great, and my friends all think that they're good, but the more people that review and critique them, the better I'll feel.
This is one of my earliest, one of my favorites, and one of Christine's favorites.
Forever Sanctuary
If only for a moment, the world is mine Fear nonexistent, pain forgotten Only joy, numbingly abundant Though sensitive enough to feel your pulse Beating against my skin If only for a day, lost in myself Lost in you, your gaze, your smile Breathing you in Peace If only for a lifetime this was waiting A sanctuary from the storm A ribbon of light around me A love... A love beyond mortality Safe. Passionate. If only forever....
Hope its okay, please leave comments and suggestions, but try to refrain from using the phrases 'suckish', 'hog crap' and 'a blind squirrel could do better'.
To see more of my poems to review and (hopefully) enjoy, just navigate over to the poetry page and check them out...some are better than others, and some I know are still works in progress, but I posted them all anyway to get more feedback.
Thanks again!
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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:11:53 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:11:53 GMT -5
Confession of a Dog Killer
I may have seen it, had it not been so foggy. Had the rain not been coming down quite as hard. If 'it' hadn't run out in front of me, emerging from the dark mist like an apparition, leaving no time for me to react. But that's just what happened.
It had been a great night until then. The spring-like thunderstorms were moving in, though just a couple weeks earlier the land had been ravaged by ice. But this isn't about the weather; it's about that dog who met its doom on the front bumper of a Ford Focus.
I was heading back from Christine's house - I had taken her to get her hair dyed - and the fog from the storm still blanketed the hills of northwest Arkansas. I came down around the last curve, taking me into the Mountainburg city limits, and in front of my friend Trey's house. The rain still beat rhythymically against my windshield, and I squinted my eyes to focus on the yellow center lines.
The dog came from nowhere.
Suddenly it was there, and before I could think I heard the crunch of bones and flesh against the car, and the painful whimper as the dog's skull was bashed in. I'm not sure if I killed it or not, I was too freaked out and afraid to stop and look so I just kept driving. The more I thought about it, the sicker I became. What if that was Trey's dog. In the split second I actually saw the dog, I was able to gather the size and color of it, and both matched the description of his dog, Friday.
So if it was Trey's dog, I'm sorry, man. If it wasn't, I'm sorry to whoever owned it. I hope that it died quickly without much pain.
Stupid dog...
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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:12:25 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:12:25 GMT -5
Getting ready for Valentine's
Hey everyone. Are you like me? Wondering what the right gift to get your special someone for valentine's day is? Maybe you should get them a big box of chocolate. Or maybe you should get them a dozen roses. They would like that. Well, stop being stupid! That's not what they want! But I know what they DO want...
CORN!
That's right, a large, b-e-a-utiful ear of corn! Your sweetie will melt with passion at the mere sight of this golden vegetable of miracles. Give corn to your mom, and she'll forgive you for never calling! Give corn to your wife, and she'll forget about that $50,000 of debt that has sunk you into financial ruin! Give corn to your girlfriend, and she'll give you that awkward first time when neither of you knows what you're doing, and it doesn't last very long, and she may cry afterwoards, but you can tell all your friends about it!
This canchange your life
So what are you waiting for? Get corn before it's too late! Supplies are limited, as the government pays farmers NOT to produce thousands of acres of corn every year to keep prices higher so the farmers can profit!
You can get your corn now for only $19.95! That's right! Only $19.95! Order in the next 20 minutes, and we'll send you not one, not two, but 500 ears of corn! What can I do with 500 ears of corn, you ask? Who cares? It only cost $19.95! CALL NOW!!
1-888-555-CORN
Get your Corn Today!
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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:14:41 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:14:41 GMT -5
Meet 'ME'
Here's a list of facts, some mundane, others interesting, so you can know who exactly 'I' am.
* I graduated from Mountainburg High School last year, 2nd in my class * I love to write, especially poems, and love making new stories. * I am madly in love with my high school sweetheart, Christine. We have been together over three years, and yes, we are engaged. * I am usually a shy person, though not nearly as much as I used to be * I play Magic the Gathering and Dungeons and Dragons * I still *sometimes* play Yu-Gi-Oh *sigh* * Most of my poems are about my life * I origianally wanted to major in history, but switched to writing * My friends call me 'Sasquatch' * I have the most forgiving parents in the world and am so happy to have them * sometimes I think I'm a pathological liar... * I wish my hair was different * I am a huge procrastinator, and have a habit of giving up on independent projects if I get bored...maybe it's ADD? * I wish I was a YouTube star * I know how much wood the woodchuck would chuck if the woodchuck could chuck wood. * My favorite movie is Braveheart * A close second is The Dark Knight * I wish I was with Christine. This is permanantly true, except when I am in fact in her presence. * I didn't vote...or register... * Christine thinks I'm weird, but loves me anyway * I used to have iron deficiency anemia * I'll make millions once I finish my book...if I ever get started on it.
So, there are some things about me. Ask questions if you need to know more, or look me up on facebook. Search Josh Shepard - I'm the sexy one.
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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:15:06 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:15:06 GMT -5
Is College for me?
I was kind of a big fish is Mountainburg, and honestly everyone thought I would go to a more distiguished school than UA Fort Smith. But I wasn't ready to leave home, and honestly didn't want a huge challenge - I'd rather have easier work and be closer to my friends and family - because it's not worth it if you are unhappy.
But lately, with the recent success I have found in my writing, I have started to wonder if college is actually helping. In my first semester, the closest I had to a writing class was World Literature, and this semester I have only one writing class. I seem to get more help from te books than the actual classes. And in all honesty, my writing hasn't improved because of the work I've done in classes, but from me reading other works online and writing more frequently.
I am at the point that if I get a decent writing job, or if my first book sells well, that I may forget college and focus more of my time on my writing career. The only way (for me at least) to improve is to write as much as possible, live and experience life, and read more so I know what's out there and what's selling. What I need isn't to be taught how to write - I know how to do that part - I need to gain more experience as a writer, get my name out there, so I can make a career out of it.
Like I said, for now it's just a thought, but if my success continues to grow I will seriously consider it. You do not have to have a degree to be a successful writer, and if it isn't helping me or making me happy, why pay to do it? I hope to get enough poems to publish a book soon enough, and if that does well, I'll revisit thi topic. Writing is my life now...it's what i want to do.
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Journal
Feb 16, 2009 11:15:29 GMT -5
Post by sascrotch on Feb 16, 2009 11:15:29 GMT -5
Miracles Happen
I was excited and ready for this valentine's day. I was going to spend the whole day with the love of my life and I felt nothing could go wrong or make this day bad.
I went to pick Christine up that morning, When I got there she was still getting ready, but I expected as much. I sat there and chatted with her brother and played with her little sister and waited until she was ready. But soon the calm was broken. Her and her mom get into an arguement ; it starts out just as a little 'serious' loud talk, but escalates into a yelling match. Christine gets upset and starts saying she doesn't want to do anything anymore and that I should just go. But I stay, and soon things calm down a little and we leave.
On the road, Christine is still really mad, and then I start to get frustrated, even though I know getting mad will only make things worse. For a while we don't say anything. I find my peace, but I am still worried about Christine. I start praying, asking God to just help her calm down. What I didn't say earlier was that when she was mad she had mentioned not being engaged anymore and just be going out. And so I also prayed to God to give me a sign that day of whether we were meant to be together or not, that however that day ended, that's how things would be - either us together or not.
Not long after I had finished my prayer, Christine paused a moment, stopped messing with her make up, looked over at me and said "I'm sorry" in the sweetest, most sincere and sad voice I've ever heard. We both apologized to each other and the rest of the day only got better. I thank God twice as much for her now, and if I didn't believe before, I definitely believe He works little miracles everyday.
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